That Dracula is a most shady person – I think he has arterior motives!
Category Archives: Humor
Well fun stuff (I hope), programming humor, word puns, etc.
At the end of the day…
At the end of the day I appreciate honesty, although I have to warn you, we’re not really at the end of the day just yet…
Rambaldi in Commuter Train Business?
In Stockholm, where I live, we have commuter trains from somewhere in Europe (I think in-fact they are from Italy).
The trains have buttons that can be pressed to open the doors. On the inside and outside. These buttons, if one can even call them buttons since they neither have the “push-in” feeling of a button, nor look pretty pushable… in fact I believe my old design teacher at my university would say they have a low affordance for being pushed.
Although, being an avid fan of the TV series Alias, I have another view on these buttons as well…
Now, that looks pretty much exactly like the symbol used by the renaissance genius and inventor Rambaldi from the TV series Alias.
Given that Swedish authorities have failed numerous times to teach us Swedes to push those buttons to open the doors to the trains without them having to open every door (especially advantageous when there’s low traffic in the summers or winters)… perhaps the buttons were never meant to be pushed? Perhaps they are the part of a sinister design to awake Rambaldi, or give some evil mastermind eternal life? Maybe that’s why so many people have a hard time pushing them? They’ve seen Alias and knows what happens to some of Rambaldi’s less fortunate Guinea pigs… ;o)
For those of you who do not know who Rambaldi is, check out wikipedia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Milo_Rambaldi
Lord Hoakz of Chaol Ghleann
Should I take the deal? Think about it! Becoming a real Scottish Lord!
Lord Hoakz of Chaol Ghleann!
Mmmm. Wow! Of course, it would cost me £24 per square feet! So it’d most likely be something like “Lord Hoakz of square foot 12789 of Chaol Ghleann”… (If you happen to be a lady or lord of that particular square foot, I can only apologize! It was an example! Let me know and I’ll change it to something else…)
The Chaol Ghleann in the Scottish Highland is selling of titles a square foot at a time. Apparently the initiative is to fund a restoration after a fire.
It seems the title is as real as it can be, and it seems it is legal as well. So much so the title is inherited by children (uh, or the eldest, mmm son?)
Anyhow, they have several different deals, even family deals with neighboring square feet (good for blood feuds!), but what strikes me the most is the “Electric Lord” package. Makes me think of some sex toy, but apparently it’s for last minute shopping…
Ah, well! Gone are the times when one had to chop off a couple of heads to get a title without inheriting it from daddy…
I guess, in the long run though, it’s for the best?
Hey! I can see a future for a “title market” where square feet are sold and bought. There should even be room for options and funds, maybe even A- and B- type squares! Wow! A competition to the Bitcoin! Indeed! But so much more inspired! If you ask me!
Life is a trial with errors…
“Life is a trial with errors…”
…so the best thing you can do is to learn to live with the trials and errors and then it doesn’t matter that there are trials and errors… because you’re still living life 😀
Oh, and yes… that quote is a bit funnier than just a simple “live life by trial and error”. I couldn’t help myself so I was funny and made life into a trial with errors… but my message is still valid!
If it’s not important that life is hard, then life being hard wont keep you from living it to the fullest extent in which you are able under your circumstances.
It’s your life! No one can take that from you unless they commit a heinous crime. If you’re alive, you have a life… it’s that simple.
41 Active Visitors from ISS – The sharpest minds read Talkwards!
See for yourselves on the right. (You may have to click on the image to read it… unless you have super vision?)
41 visitors from ISS (The International Space Station)!
Now, given my usual visit stats… this means a majority of my visitors come from ISS! Woh! So, only the worlds sharpest minds read my blog.
But wait?! How many people are there up there actually? 41 active visitors… that must be one crowded control room!
Checking the net tells me there’s only 6 people up there… guys! did you start an ISP?!
Another nagging problem is… the big fat zero up in the top left side of the image…
Can this be a bug? Nah! The zero must be the bug and I am sure those six astronauts are like super smart and obviously they have several browsers going at once… I mean, they need to get all articles quick? Right?
So, Hi to you ISS personnel up there! I hope you enjoy my blog! 😀
Oh, if you’re wondering how all this happened, it’s hardly the most amazing thing to happen today:
April fools! 🙂
Why do you age slower when you get older?
Why do you age slower when you get older?
Because according to relativity theory time moves slower in proximity to a gravity well…
Horse meat found in sausages
Horse meat found in sausages:
Company representative comments, “this is a wurst case scenario!”
The problem…
The problem isn’t that I’m thinking, the problem is what I’m thinking about…
BoRG 13 billion light years away: Invasion possibly canceled!
The BoRG are 13 billion light years away! Hope is not lost!
I found this information while I was browsing the astronomy pages on Wikipedia (more common than my geek factor can really tolerate, but still) and I came across a list (see below) of the most distant astronomical objects (notice object 8 – with a red frame?).
As far as I can tell from the list, the “BoRG-58” (shown with red frame) is somewhere between 13 and 13.025 Gly away (that’s billions of light years). I’ve understood the “z” stands for red shift, however, part from that, I’m just guessing here.
Anyhow, we need not fear! There are no direct risk of getting across the BoRG in our lifetime… assimilation has been cancelled… the BoRG are so far away it’s silly… I mean travelling at warp 9.9 it would take them 13.4 million years to get here… But since they travel at transwarp speeds I can only assume they’d be here far sooner… (Frantic Googling did not yield a good calculation for transwarp speeds… I’m guessing the federation doesn’t know them – transwarp speeds that is – and I’d have to guess… further that it would have to be BoRG transwarp speeds as well… any transwarp speed would not do here!)
Ah well… life is full of uncertainty… Perhaps we’ll be assimilated in time for the next ice age?
But wait… BoRG-58?! Where the hell are the other 57 BoRGs? Shit! DAmn! CraP!
Update from my doctor:
- They are called “BORG” not “BoRG”
- They do not exist
- You always get like this when you live life with your imagination dialled all the way up to “too vivid to handle”!
- Eat your meds and call me in the morning…
Update 2:
Mom, this is a joke! Calm down!
I know the BORG is not really for real… At least I think they’re not really for real… did anyone came across any BORG? I may have… I especially remember one girlfriend…
OK, never mind that…